Sounds like an American

I never much noticed my own accent until living abroad. Having grown up in the Midwest, I always felt lucky to have a "neutral" accent. From Minneapolis to Boston, Dallas to Nashville, my accent has evolved a bit after each city. My old roommate in Minneapolis would giggle every time the Minnesota "oh" would come out (Minne-sOH-ta) after I had wine. I can still pull out "ya'll" complete with a little Southern drawl from our time in Texas. My Chicago "a" will never disappear, just ask me to say "bag". Thankfully - and no offense to our Beantown friends - but I never adopted the Boston "r" - or lack thereof - as in "pahk the cah". If you need a good reminder of a classic Boston accent, just watch Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting.

Our oldest daughter has a hybrid Dutch, American and British accent. We can't help but laugh when she mixes British terms or Dutch with her English. "Mom, I need a plaster (band-aid)." "Are we going to the seaside?"  "Mag ik fruit?" (May I have fruit?). This is largely due to watching Cbeebies on the BBC, Peppa the Pig and Dutch cartoons. We've reached an age where  she can differentiate between English (Engles) and Dutch (Nederlands). When we ask her to sing a song for us, she'll often respond "I can't sing for you because I don’t know it in English." She sneezed the other day and I responded with "Bless you" to which she responded "No, it's gesundheit". I live with a constant reminder that my Dutch is sub-par. Ben and I are convinced that both kids will be conspiring against us in Dutch in a matter of months as our language skills are evolving at a comparatively glacial pace. 

Since moving abroad, I have become more aware and at times self-conscious of my accent. We're constantly asked if we're German based on our last name, and when we travel some think we're Dutch - though we're not nearly tall enough. But uttering a single word makes it obvious that we are American, and in the age of Donald Trump, that's not always welcome news. I can't help but notice the more negative reactions and associations it has nowadays. In a recent work call, I received (to my surprise) a disgusted response once I started speaking. "Oh you're American. I thought this was a Dutch company, is that not the case?" "Is this an American product?" she inquired.  At a recent European Cancer Advocacy conference in Budapest, I sat among 70+ people, all of whom were European, as the token American. "How does an American find herself here, working for a Dutch company?"

Don't get me wrong, I am proud to be an American. But that pride continues to be tarnished by the recent violence and toxic rhetoric that plagues the United States. The all too familiar sound of CNN's "Breaking News" makes us cringe as we've come to expect the report of another mass shooting taking place somewhere back home. When deciding to move abroad as a family in 2017, we discussed the terror incidents that rocked the cities of Paris, Berlin and Nice.  It never occurred to us that the risk of terror in the U.S. would far outpace Europe a mere 2-years later.

 

As a mom, you never stop worrying. But instead of bruised knees, I worry about what awaits us when we eventually return home. Will we be able to take our kids to public events? How am I going to explain this environment to them when they've only known the relative Utopia that is Utrecht?  I think about Nashville, a city experiencing tremendous growth thanks in part to its popular downtown scene. Will we ever feel comfortable going out on Broadway knowing the risks associated with such popular destinations? 

I recently came across a quote that reminded me that I have to take my anger, frustration and actually do something.

"The pessimist complains about the wind, the optimist expects it to change, the realist adjusts the sails." - William A Ward

Until now, I have been sitting back hoping, praying, wishing that change would happen. While we may be living across the pond, I remind myself that we're not helpless or hopeless. We can still exercise our right to hold our congress and representatives accountable, which is exactly what I plan to do (and if they think they can ignore us because we're 4,000 miles away....well, we'll be home soon enough). So here's to change, and to pushing beyond our comfort zone. Here's to opening ourselves to new experiences, languages, and even laws, recognizing that we can learn from other cultures - some of whom seem to have these things figured out a little better than we do. Now, if you excuse me, I need to go practice my Dutch. Tot zo!